Blameless by Gail Carriger
Alexia is back home with the Loontwills and it's as horrible as one can imagine, especially since she is carrying an infant inconvenience. She's been there for a couple of weeks since returning from Scotland, turned away by her husband, werewolf Conall Maccon, who can't possibly believe that he is the father of her unborn child. He is though! Unfortunately, Felicity, horrible sister that she is, let slip Alexia's condition and now it's in the papers, causing her family to turn her out as well. Luckily, Alexia has two great friends who would probably take care of her, one with an unfortunate liking for ugly hats, and the other, an eccentric dandy vampire. Ivy and her new husband Tunstell cannot take Alexia in, but Lord Akeldama can. A quick peek into the Woolsey pack shows Conall being drunk and sad. Lyall tries to help him and says that Alexia is probably in danger, trying to rouse him into action, but he's too drunk to care.
Alexia discovers everyone is gone from Lord Akeldama's house, except for one new fellow called Boots and a cat. Boots says the cat has a secret message, so Alexia investigates and finds the message on the cat's collar. In order to decipher the message, Alexia needs the help of her favorite lady scientist, Madame Lefoux. On her way to Chapeau de Poupe, Alexia’s carriage is attacked by a swarm of giant mechanical clockwork ladybugs! Luckily she comes away from the attack unscathed and is able to capture one for further investigation. In order to cope with the morning's events, Alexia simply must take tea, but she is judged most harshly by all the ladies in the tea shop. She leaves, kind of in disgrace, but mostly just fed up. She goes to a pawn shop, sells all her jewelry, and plans to leave London.
Lyall and Floote go to Chapeau de Poupe. Lyall thinks Madame Lefoux is planning on traveling because her laboratory is quite tidy and her son, Quesnel, is away at school. Everyone comes to the agreement that Alexia is pregnant and the child belongs to Conall. Lyall believes the vampires, led by Lord Ambrose, are the ones who stole her journal and tried to poison her on board the dirigible. Does Lord Akeldama have anything to do with this? He's been remarkably silent lately.
Alexia arrives at this moment and alerts them all of her plans to leave London. Lyall and Madame Lefoux also think this is a good idea. Apparently Lord Akeldama does, too, as that is the secret message hidden on the cat collar. They then examine the ladybug but it explodes, which leads Madame Lefoux to believe it was sent by vampires. They discuss Conall a little and Alexia is pleased to learn that he's drunk all the time and miserable. Madame Lefoux plans to accompany Alexia on her journey out of London, leaving Lyall in charge of her laboratory and Ivy in charge of her hat shop, questionable as that may be. Floote will be accompanying them as well. Lyall is convinced that the vampires are trying to kill Alexia and she agrees considering the only one who would be able to help her is missing. She decides to visit Italy in hopes of finding more information on preternaturals there, since her father was Italian.
Ivy comes to the shop and agrees to take it over. Alexia tells her she's leaving because of the newspapers, not because people are trying to kill her. Ivy gives Alexia some tea when she discovers where they are going because they drink coffee in Italy, Alexia! Lyall meanwhile is trying to get a drunk-on-formaldehyde, opera-singing Conall out of the cold bathtub. Channing Channing of the Chesterfield Channings was supposed to be keeping an eye on him but he's left, on Conall's orders, maybe to track Akeldama? Conall seems to not like Akeldama in this instance, but at least he knows he is not the father of Alexia’s child. Lyall decides he needs to call a pack meeting.
Alexia, Floote and Madame Lefoux begin their journey to Italy - incognito. Alexia is dressed like an outlandish bumblebee, pretending to be an aged opera singer, and Madame Lefoux, wearing a delightfully hilarious oversized mustache, is her gentleman friend. Floote is just Floote. Alexia and Madame Lefoux talk about missing Conall and Alexia agrees that she does miss him, but she's also angry at him. He's left her completely alone in this situation with the infant inconvenience. She's worried that she won't be able to carry to term because preternaturals breed true and naturally repel each other. If she is able to give birth, will she be able to stand being in the same room with her child? What is she supposed to do and how is she supposed to do it alone? She decides she wants to do something reckless, like Conall is, being drunk all the time. At this moment, Madame Lefoux kisses Alexia. Not quite what she had in mind, but not exactly bad either.
They make it to France and stay with a friend of Madame Lefoux’s from school. Trouvé is a clockmaker and inventor and is very interested in Alexia’s inconvenience as he once met her father. Has absolutely everyone met him except for her?! He mentions Alessandro Tarabotti doing business with inventors but stops abruptly, perhaps because of a glance from Floote. Tea arrives then and Alexia is horrified to see it carried in by a clockwork ladybug, just like the ones that attacked her! It seems that the vampires worked with Trouvé to acquire these bugs, but Trouvé insists that he did not make them into the weapons they became. Unfortunately, they are soon attacked by vampires.
Lyall’s pack meeting is to divide up duties while Conall is inebriated. Unfortunately, a loner comes to challenge and Lyall must fight in his alpha’s stead. He doesn't mind fighting, he's actually quite good at it, but he does get so dirty. The fight begins and is going pretty well, but then Conall arrives and throws Lyall out of the circle of onlookers and takes his place. He's definitely drunk, but can still defend himself and his pack. He ends up biting the loner wolf's eyeballs and ears, ending the fight.
Alexia and her friends, meanwhile, are fighting four vampires in the clock shop. Floote kills two of them with concealed single-shot sundowner guns. Alexia uses all her darts in her parasol and, as they escape up the stairs to barricade themselves in safety, she uses her acid, which significantly slows the vampires down. They get into the attic and up to the roof where Trouvé has an ornithopter. Then they hear another creature joining the fray. As Madame Lefoux, Alexia and Floote fly away, Alexia sees a great white beast.
Lyall decides to go off in search of Lord Akeldama and learns from a blood whore that he is elsewhere but that Countess Nadasdy might know where. Lyall then pays a visit to the Tunstells, and gets some rather interesting information from Ivy, which he was not expecting. While running Chapeau de Poupe, Ivy overheard Mabel Dair, Vampire Queen Countess Nadasdy’s favorite drone who had come to retrieve an order for said countess, that the queen, working with a “potent man,” obviously the Potentate, wants to steal something from Lord Akeldama.
After flying away on the ornithopter and crashing in Nice, Alexia, Madame Lefoux and Floote meet Lange-Wilsdorf. He is a German scientist and member of the Order of the Brass Octopus who is enamored with Alexia. He is also the foremost expert scientist of preternaturals. He's pleased to meet Alexia, who he refers to as a female specimen, but is wary of Floote until he discovers that he is not supernatural. Lange-Wilsdorf is certain that Alexia will miscarry because preternaturals always breed true. But … in every other instance, the other partner has always been a normal person, not a supernatural. Madame Lefoux is certain Alexia’s infant inconvenience is something else, after all, why would the vampires want to kill her if she was just going to miscarry? When Lange-Wilsdorf hears that vampires are after Alexia, he forces them to leave his home. He hates supernaturals. He gives them everything they need to make it to the Templars in Italy.
Unfortunately, on their journey to Italy, they are chased by vampire drones. After a long, harrowing, exciting adventure, they cross the border into Italy and are met by the Templars. They know exactly who Alexia is, tell her they've been waiting a long time for her return, then they inject her with something and she passes out. Meanwhile, back at Woolsey, Conall finally comes to his senses about Alexia and admits that Alexia’s pregnancy is his doing. Lyall suggests he grovel publicly by way of the newspaper and he agrees. He will stop by the newspaper on his way to Italy to find his wife. He questions why Akeldama hasn't helped, and Lyall alerts him that Akeldama and all his drones are missing, gone to look for something Lord Ambrose stole.
Alexia wakes after three days unconscious. She follows her nose from her room to breakfast where she finds Floote and Madame Lefoux seated amongst the Templars. None of the Templars will speak to Alexia or serve her, or even give her a plate to eat from. Floote shares his with her and, when she's done eating, tosses her plate over the fence. Apparently, the Templars don't like preternaturals much. They think they are demons. A leader of the Templars explains this to Alexia later after showing her a device invented by Lange-Wilsdorf. This device detects aether and when Alexia breathes into it, it has no reaction. Clearly being preternatural means she puts out no aether, but normal humans and perhaps others with excess soul do. Interesting.
The Dewan, the Queen's head werewolf, comes to call, and he has bad news. Lyall greets him as Conall is away, investigating the whereabouts of Lord Akeldama. The Dewan intercepted an aethegraphic transmission from the Potentate to Paris, calling for Alexia's death. Clearly the vampires believe that Alexia’s infant inconvenience is not a preternatural and that it must be destroyed. Conall walks in, nakedly, and is furious that anyone wants his wife dead. After the Dewan leaves, giving that information to his fellow werewolves as a wolf and not as an agent of the Queen, Conall declares he's found where the object stolen from Lord Akeldama is and he and Lyall are going to retrieve it.
Alexia, Floote and Madame Lefoux, followed distantly by Templars, travel to retrieve their belongings sent by Trouvé. Along with their things is a letter from Ivy telling Alexia about creating a new hair accessory for dirigible travel, Hair Muffs. She also writes that Captain Featherstonehaugh has dumped her sister and is now engaged to another woman and presumably this is Alexia's fault. Along with the letter is a clipping from the newspaper advertising the Hair Muffs, but on the back is Conall's printed retraction. Alexia cries in relief, but doesn't have long to think on this because more drones arrive intent on killing her. They try to fight them off but are almost defeated until a masked man arrives to help them. The Templars soon catch up and the drones are all defeated.
Back at the Templars’ temple, Alexia spends the night reading and then discovers a chamber where she finds many body parts concealed in jars. Floote has followed her and alerts her that the jars are weapons, meaning that body parts inside are pieces of preternaturals. Floote assures Alexia that he had her father completely cremated, so none of these parts are his. Alexia insists that they alert the Queen even though she is no longer Muhjah. She sends Floote off to send an aethegraphic transmission to Lyall.
Conall and Lyall make their way to the Thames where Lord Akeldama’s stolen item is sunk. The item in question is Biffy, Lord Akeldama's favorite drone. He's still alive underneath the river, having a breathing tube, but he's not well. Lyall dives down to retrieve Biffy while Conall fights off multiple drones. He is forced to use his sundowner weapon on a vampire who begins shooting at them after a shot strikes Biffy. That vampire just so happens to be the Potentate and Conall has killed him. Before they can deal with this, Lyall insists that Conall try to turn Biffy in the hopes of keeping him alive. Conall is successful and Biffy is no longer Akeldama's favorite drone, and is instead a beautiful chocolate brown wolf.
Lyall takes Biffy to the Tunstell home and helps him through his first transformation back into a person. Biffy sobs as he eats a raw steak, but at least he's happy to be alive. He says that Lord Akeldama will have been mad at him if he died. Alexia meanwhile is on a picnic with Madame Lefoux and the Templars, but it seems that they're just using her as bait to kill vampires because they are, not shockingly, attacked by vampires. Just when it seems that Alexia is going to be overpowered, a great white wolf attacks the vampire. Alexia realizes of course who this white wolf is, and that he was also the creature that attacked the vampires in the clock shop and also the masked figure. It's none other than Channing Channing of the Chesterfield Channings, sent by Conall back before he apologized in the papers. He must have still loved her the entire time!
Lyall and Biffy head back to BUR headquarters after Tunstell alerts Lyall that everyone is in a tizzy because the Potentate is dead. There are many visitors to the office but the most important ones are Lord Akeldama and Queen Victoria. Lord Akeldama is most upset about his darling Biffy being metamorphosed into a werewolf and goes so far as to say that they should have just let him die. Biffy wakes and questions Lord Akeldama then and there is a moment of tenderness between the vampire and his former drone that Lyall must look away from. That is when the Queen arrives.
Queen Victoria interrogates Biffy about being kidnapped by the Potentate and he admits that it is true. Then she questions Lord Akeldama about the punishment the Potentate received, death by the official Sundowner. He admits that maybe the punishment was too strict, but accepts it. Queen Victoria then reinstates Alexia as Muhjah since everything bad that has happened recently seems to be because of the Potentate’s actions. Before leaving, there is a question about Alexia’s child, and Lord Akeldama reveals that it will be a Soul Stealer, not a Soul Sucker, as Alexia is, and there haven't been many other instances of their existence.
Alexia meanwhile is now alone with the Templars. After the attack at the picnic, Madame Lefoux, who was injured, was sent away to a hospital and Floote, who left to deliver his message, was not allowed to return. Well, this is not going to be good. Soon, Lange-Wilsdorf arrives, having been welcomed back to the Templars after discovering some new science that might determine what Alexia's child will be. The Templars then move Alexia deep down in the catacombs. She convinces Lange-Wilsdorf to let her research the information gathered by the Templars over the years and comes across a tablet with information about a Stealer of Souls or a Stalker of Skins and knows that is what the infant inconvenience will be. She questions the Templars about that later and learns that they are terrified and enamored by such a creature who can be both mortal and immortal at the same time. At this moment, Alexia cracks the lead Templar over the head with her stool and attempts to flee the catacombs. Luckily, giant clockwork ladybugs arrive then as well.
Queen Victoria makes Lord Akeldama the new Potentate, therefore making pretty much everything going on now his problem. After she leaves, Lyall questions why Lord Akeldama doesn't seem to fear the child as much as everyone else does, and he declares it is because Alexia is his friend, so her child would learn everything from her. Lyall then thinks of a great plan to keep everyone, especially Alexia and Biffy, safe.
Following the ladybugs is Channing Channing of the Chesterfield Channings and Madame Lefoux, Floote and Trouvé. Together they all defeat a lot of Templars. They also encounter Lange-Wilsdorf and several vampires. Lange-Wilsdorf is upset with Madame Lefoux and Trouvé, fellow members of the Order of the Brass Octopus, for wanting to help Alexia instead of vivisect her and the infant inconvenience. Working together, they defeat more enemies and escape the catacombs. Channing Channing of the Chesterfield Channings shifts back into human form when they are a safe distance away and Alexia questions him about coming to her rescue. It is then that Lord Maccon approaches letting everyone know he is responsible for sending Channing Channing of the Chesterfield Channings after his wife before he got too inebriated on formaldehyde. Everything wraps up tidily after this, and everyone, including Alexia and Conall, go back home happy.