Living Dead in Dallas

Check out our episode here! Living Dead in Dallas by Charlaine Harris

Sookie Stackhouse, telepathic barmaid at Merlotte's bar in Bon Temps, Louisiana, is currently trying hard not to read the mind of Detective Andy Bellefleur as he's getting soused. Sookie thinks it's odd for Andy to be getting so drunk. He normally doesn't drink so much, so her curiosity gets the better of her and she reads his mind. She learns that Andy arrested a man earlier in the day for violating his young neighbor and isn't coping too well with it. Sookie calls Andy's sister, Portia, to come pick him up. They leave the bar with plans to return the next day at lunch to get Andy's car, but it'll be okay in the parking lot overnight.

Vampire Bill comes to see Sookie at the bar around the same time. He's been away in Shreveport working his new vampire job, the Investigator of Region Five, and needs Sookie to come with him the next night for help. Sookie has to change her shift around but agrees to go even though it means she's working late that night and early the next day. Everyone in town is a little more used to Vampire Bill now, thank goodness, and even Jason, Sookie's brother, is nice to him. Sookie and Bill leave Merlotte's, get up to some sexy hot tub shenanigans at Bill's house, and she turns in for the night. Bill is dead for the day as she leaves for work in the morning.

When she arrives at Merlotte's, Sookie sees Andy's car is still in the parking lot, but notices that his back door is slightly ajar. She goes over to push it closed but... it won't shut. Sookie opens the door to see what's keeping it from closing and is devastated to find the body of the Merlotte's cook, Lafayette, naked in the back seat, his beautifully pedicured feet blocking the door. She runs to get Sam who calls the police, and shortly thereafter, Sheriff Bud Dearborn and another officer, Alcee, arrive. Alcee is black like Lafayette, which is rare in the small town of Bon Temps. He doesn't at all agree with Lafayette's lifestyle choices, so we immediately dislike him. They question Sookie about what Lafayette has been up to lately and she tells them of an orgy he said he went to just the other night. That's another thing that's rare in Bon Temps.

Work is a little odd but once the police are gone from the parking lot, things pick up. Terry Bellefleur has come in to take Lafayette's place and things go smoothly considering there was just a corpse outside. Danielle and Holly, two of early shift waitresses at Merlotte's, are there and the day passes without much incident. Later that night, Sookie and Bill head to Fangtasia but they get in a weird argument on the way about Bill buying property and several businesses and Sookie being able to patronize those businesses for free. Then Bill's car dies. Sookie, extremely upset at being gifted free meals and manicures, gets out of the car and starts walking while Bill finds a mechanic.

This is a terrible idea what with Lafayette's murderer on the loose, but Sookie is so mad for whatever reason, so she storms off... and almost immediately hears someone following her. It's a disheveled woman with a giant razorback hog with her. She says she is a maenad and that she has a message for Eric Northman. That message is a violent attack on Sookie. Bill finds Sookie on the side of the road, her back torn to shreds, and takes her to Fangtasia.

When they arrive, Eric and Pam call in a doctor, but she's no ordinary doctor, she's a dwarf, and she licks the wounds on Sookie's back to heal them. Unfortunately the wounds are not only ghastly but they are also poisonous and so the vampires must take turns sipping away Sookie's blood to drain her of the poison. Eventually she is well, but Bill is not too happy that everybody got a taste of Sookie because we all know, Sookie is mine! but he gets to brush her hair afterward, so it's all good. Everyone is concerned that a maenad has come to town because they thrive on alcoholic carnage and demand tribute... or else. Since Eric owns a bar, well, the maenad is obviously going to be interested, so everyone is on high alert.

After Sookie is healed and brushed, they get down to the business that brought them to Fangtasia in the first place. A vampire in Dallas has gone missing and they need Sookie to use her telepathy to find out where he has gone. She and Bill will leave soon, but before they go, Sookie wants to warn Sam of the maenad. She goes to Merlotte's and, after asking for the vacation days needed to take her trip to Dallas, she tells him. And he laughs. And then they kiss? It's a bizarre sort of day, but most days are bizarre for Sookie anymore. Sam appreciates that Sookie cares enough about him to warm him and also understands that she's in love with Bill. Well, she's not in love, but she does love Bill and respect him, so she and Sam can't behave that way. Plus he's her boss.

Soon enough, Sookie and Bill are on their way to Dallas. It's her first flight and Bill is shipped in a coffin. When they arrive, shortly before sunset, Sookie is standing around waiting for Bill's coffin to be unloaded and a weird priest comes up to her. Sookie gets eerie vibes from him and starts to pepper spray him, but then Bill wakes up and is there in an instant and the priest runs away. Sookie didn't read his mind but did get the feeling he was trying to kidnap her. Good thing the sun went down and Bill woke up! Sookie and Bill go to their vampire hotel and get checked in. The bellhop who shows them to their room is a young guy, Barry, who Sookie realizes is another telepath! She doesn't get a chance to talk to him, though, because they need to get to work.

Bill and Sookie are taken to meet with the Dallas vampires by a lady vampire named Isabel. The Dallas vampires live in a mansion in a nest, meaning that there are a lot of vampires in one home and a few humans, too. Sookie meets Stan, the leader of this nest, and is put to work almost immediately. She is supposed to read the mind of a girl, Bethany, who works at a vampire bar and was one of the last ones to see the missing vampire, Farrell, before he disappeared. Sookie has been training her telepathy and now has the ability to hypnotize people and can sometimes read brief snippets of vampire minds, but no one knows that, not even Bill. Sookie puts the girl into a meditative trance and finds out what she knows about the missing vampire. He was last seen with another vampire, one who looks young and has tattoos, and the bouncer at the club, a fangbanger named Re-Bar. While looking through Bethany’s mind, Sookie also saw a human that she recognized, the creepy priest that tried to kidnap her. Obviously the creepy priest is partially responsible for the kidnapping and so is the unknown tattooed vampire.

Next, they bring in Re-Bar for Sookie to talk to, but his mind is completely ruined, almost like he was lobotomized. Sookie talks to a few more people, including a vampire, who also doesn’t recognize the tattooed vampire, but the description she provides inspires Bill to borrow a computer and do his own research. He discovers that the vampire is called Godric and he's a renouncer, someone who has given up the vampiric ways, and has plans to commit suicide with the help of The Fellowship of the Sun, a cult that is like the vampire version of the KKK, and he plans to take Farrell with him. The fake priest who was at the bar and the airport is probably a part of this group, but how did he know that Sookie would be at the airport?

Sookie gets the idea that maybe there is a bug hidden somewhere and she discovers one underneath the table. They loudly announce that Bill and Sookie are going back to Louisiana and that they all believe Farrell to be dead, then they stage a fake water spilling and destroy the bug. They make actual plans for Sookie and Hugo, a human who helped with the bug-destroying who is in a relationship with Isabel, to pretend to be a couple and go to The Fellowship of the Sun to investigate. Also during this time, Eric shows up pretending to be a vampire from California called Leif. Sookie and Bill go back to the hotel. They are about to have sex but are briefly interrupted by Eric Leif who needs to talk to Bill the next evening.

The next day as Sookie is getting ready to go to The Fellowship, she sees a news report that Bethany, the girl she interrogated, was found murdered in a dumpster. Surely the vampires wouldn't have done that, but who would? She requests some drab clothes from the front desk, dons a wig and waits for Hugo to come pick her up. As they drive to The Fellowship, they work on a cover story and chat about their relationships with the vampires. They will pretend to be a new couple who met at church. Hugo says he's not a good actor so he doesn't want to have to come up with much, so they pretty much stick with his actual story. He's a lawyer that represented Stan the Vampire in court but now he's "seen the error of his ways."

Sarah Newlin, wife of the director of The Fellowship of the Sun, Steve Newlin, gives Marigold, aka Sookie, and Hugo a tour of the complex and tells them about a lock-in they're going to have that night and about the special sunrise ceremony they're having the next day. This must be when Godric and Farrell are going to meet the sun. As the tour goes on, they pass by someone who Sookie detects is a shapeshifter, but then they are joined by Steve and are taken to a doorway that leads downstairs into a bunker. Marigold pretends to be claustrophobic and wants to get the hell out of there as she's getting some really weird vibes from everyone, but as she tries to leave, she's pulled down the stairs and forced into a cell! They knew who she was the whole time, but how?

Hugo. Hugo is how. He's a traitor! After his win in court with Stan, he became enthralled with the vampires, particularly Isabel. He began to lose clients because he just couldn't get away from his vampire girlfriend. He got angry with her one day and had been previously contacted by The Fellowship, so now he's in cahoots with them and surely they're going to come and let him out of this cell. Oh wait, they're not because he's still a traitor to the human race, so instead they're going to give him to Farrell who is also locked up and who is gay and who hasn't eaten for a long time. They're definitely not going to let Sookie go either. She's going to be chained up with the vampires as they burst into flames in the morning. Before that can happen though, a douchey guard comes in and tries to assault her. She calls for help and who should come to her rescue but Godric!

Godric was strolling around free because he's at The Fellowship willingly and ready to die in the morning. He saves Sookie from her attacker and kills him which makes him feel even more badly about being a vampire. He tells Sookie that he's meeting the sun because he's led a terrible life of killing and pillaging for 1000 years and he's done with it. She manages to convince him that she's not a bad person even though she's friendly with vampires, so he helps her escape.

On their way out of The Fellowship, they encounter Sarah and Steve Newlin. Godric pushes Sookie into an office and distracts the Newlins before they see her by telling them that maybe he's changed his mind. Sookie has no idea how long she's going to be trapped, so she gathers all her mental strength and connects telepathically with Barry the Bellboy. She tells him who she is and asks him to tell her vampire where she is as soon as he wakes for the evening. Luckily she's able to get out of the office after some time and sneaks through the building and into the sanctuary. She hides under a pew when she sees a family come in for the lock-in, and after a few minutes, she gets out and tries to leave. They spot her before she's out the door though and make a big fuss about her injuries from being yanked down the stairs. As they're trying to get her first aid, a woman comes in pretending that she and Sookie have been friends for the longest time and helps her escape. Finally!

This woman is named Luna and she is the shapeshifter Sookie detected earlier. She recognized Sookie as something other than human and knew she had to help her. She and some other supernaturals, or supes as she calls them, are keeping an eye on The Fellowship because they know if they find out that other supes exist, they'll make their lives terrible and, unlike vampires, they don't want to mainstream with the humans. Sookie asks why they didn't call the vampires when Godric and Farrell showed up, but Luna didn't know about Farrell and Godric came to die all on his own, so why should she stop him? Sookie tells Luna she's going to tell the vampires that Farrell is there and they're going to come for him, so the supes better stay away from The Fellowship for a while.

As Sookie and Luna are trying to leave without anyone noticing them, huge flood lights come on. Steve and Sarah must have realized Sookie escaped! She and Luna get into Luna's car and drive away but they're followed and eventually rear-ended by Sarah. The resulting crash is awful and Sookie comes to hanging upside down by her seatbelt. Sarah is there, fake-trying to help Sookie, but she tells anyone who will listen that she doesn't want anything to do with this woman. Soon enough, paramedics and police arrive and Sookie and Luna are taken to the hospital.

Luna is pleased with this turn of events because she knows some supernatural doctors who treat Sookie and sneak them out of the hospital and into a car driven by werewolves. The wolves take Sookie back to the vampire hotel and who should be waiting outside for her arrival but Eric. He helps her up to her room and calls Bill who had gone to The Fellowship to rescue her. He, Stan, Isabel and others found Farrell and Hugo and got them out. Hugo is in trouble of course, but all in all, everything turned out okay. Bill bathes Sookie and, surprise, waits to brush her hair, and she falls asleep in his arms.

Sookie wakes before dawn the next morning and takes a cab back to The Fellowship where she finds Godric waiting to greet the sun. Sookie stays with him until the sun rises and he bursts into flames, then quietly and sadly returns to the hotel and her bed. When Bill wakes her later it's because they have to go talk to Stan about everything that has happened over the past two days. Sookie does not want to go but of course she has to.

There is a party to celebrate Farrell's return, so it's not all bad. Sookie tells Stan everything and then asks about what will become of Hugo. Part of her agreement in working with the vampires is that no humans will be killed, so she is curious about his punishment. Hugo and Isabel have been chained together and are being kept in isolation. Because Isabel brought in a traitorous human, she's chained with silver and won't get to eat. Hugo will get to eat, but he's thralled to Isabel and won't get to have sex with her, so that is his punishment. At the end of their isolation, he will be released first and Isabel will follow after, probably to eat him.

As the party continues, Eric comes over and talks to Sookie, but then she realizes she can hear the angry thoughts of the fellowship as they surround the house with guns. She shouts for everyone to get down and all the vampires drop, but the humans aren't fast enough and they get shot from all angles around the house. Eric shields Sookie but gets shot in the shoulder. He asks her to suck the bullet out of his shoulder because that's apparently the only way to get the bullet out *wink* and she does. While this is happening, Bill and many of the other vampires chase the members of the fellowship and eat some of them, which upsets Sookie so much that she immediately leaves and goes to the airport and back to Bon Temps.

Sookie is so upset about Bill being a vampire that she doesn't talk to him for weeks. He starts dating Portia Bellefleur which is strange because he hates the Bellefleur family for some unknown reason and Portia always acts terrified of Bill. This may be odd, but not as odd as everyone else in Bon Temps who suddenly seems to be really into orgies. One night, Sookie sees Bill at a high school football game with Portia. Sookie is there with her old high school friend Tara and her fiancé Benedict, aka Eggs. Bill and Sookie are both jealous of each other and they get secretly back together after that with pretty violent sex.

After this, Sookie decides to try to solve Lafayette's murder. She determined that Portia was only dating Bill in order to entice the orgy people into inviting her to an orgy so she could investigate and clear Andy of suspicion, and so Sookie tries the same tactic. She calls Bill to see what he thinks, but he has had to go back to Dallas. He informs her that Eric will be in town while he is away and that the maenad did not appreciate whatever tribute they offered her. After being invited to the orgy by Mike Spencer, the funeral director, Sookie asks Eric to go with her, and she asks him to pretend to be gay because that will be more fitting for the orgy.

Eric picks Sookie up wearing spandex pants and a pink net shirt and she puts on her daisy dukes from junior high and they head to the party. Eric kisses her before they go in, but she assumes she'd have to at least kiss people at this party, so she doesn't mind it. (Also, hello, it's Eric.) The orgy is, quite frankly, disgusting. Tara is there with Eggs, but Sookie can tell she doesn't really want to be there. Sookie tries to listen in on everyone's thoughts while surrounded by flopping penises and glistening bosoms. She learns that Eggs was involved with Lafayette before his death and Mike the funeral director and a man named Tom and his wife Cleo were responsible for his death. Sookie gets overwhelmed and grossed out by the orgy, so she asks Eric to take her outside. This was a huge mistake.

While they are outside, pretending to make out on the hood of Eric's car while people creepily watch from behind the curtains, Bill shows up, and so does Andy Bellefleur, and then Sam, in dog form, and the maenad, Callisto. Andy is drunk and there to get Sookie to find out who killed Lafayette, which duh, she is already doing that. Callisto loves this orgy and the rage that Andy is feeling and calls everyone out to the porch and riles them all up. All the orgiests are full of fear and it's channeling straight into Sookie's mind. Callisto ends up filling everyone with a wild sort of berserker madness and almost everyone at the orgy dies, apart from Andy and Eggs, who she froze over on the sidelines, and Tara who hid under a table. Content with this tribute, Callisto disappears into the forest. (The first one that she wasn't happy with was Lafayette's, poor thing.)

Portia comes to pick up Andy and take him home. Before they go, Eric and Bill try to clean Callisto's murder orgy by burning the place down. Andy is upset because there is no evidence that Mike and Tom and Cleo killed Lafayette, but oh, there is, and it's in the trunk of Mike's car. Bill and Eric stage the fire so the car will be undamaged and then they all leave.

The next day, after much bathing and hair brushing, Sookie wakes to find a cake on her doorstep and a message on her answering machine from Grandma Bellefleur. When Sookie says her name, Caroline Holliday Bellefleur, Bill stops dead. He asks Sookie to go to his house and get his family bible. Together they read through all the names in the family tree. Bill's wife's maiden name was Holliday. Through some marrying of cousins, Bill's daughter's daughter Caroline Holliday became Caroline Holliday Bellefleur and Andy and Portia are his great-great-great-grandchildren. Weird. Bill dated his granddaughter. After this endearing look through the family bible, we finally learn why Bill hated the Bellefleurs until this very moment. When Bill was in the Civil War, a young soldier, Jebediah Bellefleur, was responsible for his friend's death. Bill can *really* hold a grudge.